I am glad that Thanksgiving is over. How sad is that? I don't think I have ever said that. I miss Andy terribly. And holidays are just the worst. So far he has missed Jordans 16th b. day and now Thanksgiving. There are a slew more of holidays to come while he is gone. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. Ever. I feel like my heart has been ripped out. I should be thankful that he calls every few days. he only gets to talk for 30 minutes, which flies by. And I fight back tears the whole time. When I hear his voice, I just want to see him, to touch him, to have him hold me. When I write letters or emails I just want to pour out my heart. I want to cry, scream, take out all my anger about this stupid stupid war. Its not fair. Its not fair that my husband is in a war zone for what reason? I can't find a reason for it. Is he protecting our freedom? I don't think so. My kids didn't ask for this life. They weren't asked if they wanted to be seperated from their father for nearly a year. We made this decision to join the Navy. Not thinking he would be in a war zone. Believing that he would only be on ships and only for at most 6 months at a time. Money is not everything. Benefits are not everything. How many people are lieing on their death bed and say, oh i wish i had made more money? No, they say they wish they had made more time for their kids or spent more one on one time w/ their spouse.
I just want to be with him. This is not how things are meant to be.
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